Newborn

Transition from #Pregnancy to #Parenthood: A Love Path

May 29, 2017 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

For first time parents, pregnancy can be a bliss. If this period is risk-free, you’ll find yourselves awning in the thought of your soon to be born baby. The only thing is nobody is quite prepared for what’s coming. The transition from pregnancy to parenthood is a period of adjustment that most people feel is quite difficult. Nothing in the world can prepare you for this new stage of your life but we would like to share some thoughts with you. Remember that parenthood has never come with a book and no matter how much advice you receive, it’s the experience of holding that child of yours in your arms that will change your perspectives on life.

Parenthood is a universal experience. Since the beginning of life, all beings have reproduced to be able to endure. Us, as humans, experience joy at becoming parents. The catch of this whole situation is becoming a parent for the first time. The transition between these two stages is crucial in the lives of many people and that’s what we’re going to talk about: How to ease the passage from having a baby in your womb to taking care of a baby and choosing how to raise that child.

Educate yourself

The BMC Pregnancy and Childbirth Journal published in 2009 a study on the transition to parenthood. Even though it could be considered outdated, it goes to show the great similarities every parent must face, from the early stages of humankind to their last. Being a single person with no children is certainly different than having to care about someone.

Nobody knows what it means to have children but parents. Seriously. No matter if it is a priest or a teacher: If they don’t have children, it’s impossible to really know what it means to feel the responsibility of being the person designed to care for that human being in such a vulnerable stage of their lives.

The study we previously mentioned was held in the United Kingdom, where people feel in a somewhat stable environment to have children and raise a family. Those interviewed expressed that besides family and friends with children, health professionals and midwives, the main source of reliable information were antenatal courses.

You will never learn everything there is to know about your family and your children but getting educated on these issues can relieve you from many distresses. Nobody knows everything there is to know about children and how to raise a family but it’s alright.

Expectations vs Reality

Pregnancy, when risk-free, can be a bliss. From your family to the media and every surrounding tell you that motherhood will be a joyous experience. You start envisioning every moment of your parenting days as they tell you. The only reference you have is the parents around you and the things you see on the internet, on TV or even in movies. You dedicate in choosing every décor you want for your baby’s nursery and when watching parents you tell yourself what you would do in that situation

The reality is another. When you’re facing your child for the first time you feel love, you feel scared, you feel so many things at once that it overwhelms you but it’s necessary that you know everything is going to be alright.

Children are tiny. There is nothing to fear. Their minds will develop and so will their feelings. We know that this new stage in your life might cause you some distress but that is also why these lines exist. New parents need any help they can receive and family members, friends, health professionals, doulas alongside books, courses and blogs can be quite helpful.

We can’t tell you how it is really going to be. Maybe your experience will be the best in the world or it will feel like drowning sometimes. What matters is that you feel alright most of the time and that your child is being taken care of. You should try to battle those over the top expectations and know that the only thing certain is that you need to have your baby in your arms to know how you feel about parenting.

New beginnings

As Developmental Science talks about it on a post “The transition to parenthood is profound, as many parents already know. Developmental scientists consider it to be one of the most massive reorganizations in the lifespan, changing the brains, endocrine systems, behaviors, identities, relationships, and more, of everyone involved”

Your life changes when you have a child. It seems quite perfect that pregnancy lasts nine whole months where you prepare yourself to birth a child. When that new human being arrives at your life, undoubtedly the feeling starts showing up. Ask any parent.

While pregnant you don’t really know who is that person inside you but once you meet that special little chap, everything you’ve learnt, heard, or read starts to make sense. Good thing that child still needs a lot of closeness and caring in the first years of their lives.

That time when you get to see your child face to face and your parental instinct shows up is when you start to decide your parenting methods and how do you want to approach that child. This is an advice we strongly believe in and we want to teach you. Don’t try to hurry things up. You, as a parent, need your time to figure out things and that’s fine. Everything will find a solution, all you need is to love your child first. Writer Robin Hoffman talks about it in The Huffington Post.

Parenting

Maybe you started outlining your parenting style way before he was born but as we assured before, one definitely know as a parent what will work for each of our families the moment that we have our child in our arms. You might as well choose from this list from Parent.co or outline your own parenting method, the results will be the same: As your child grows, you’ll learn which things work better for you and your family.

As the BMC study outlined, education is the best tool you have. It also showed that mothers were the ones who got more education regarding children upbringing and those first days as parents. It is true that aspects of breastfeeding are almost only concerned to mothers, it is important that in our modern society we keep the other parent involved too. Whoever is raising the children should get totally involved in every aspect of their beings.

Every bit of help to make the transition from pregnancy to parenting is great

We’ve been outlining how impossible it is to know everything about children and parenting from others but we need to remind you that it does help. Try to remember this advice when you’re at that critical moment that is having your newborn in your arms after that busy time pregnancy was.

Parent Partner

If you’re on this journey with company, also remember they exist as people. You need to take care of your partner’s feelings, that’s why you’re together. As they take care of you, you take care of them. It’s just logical. Share the co-pilot seat of parenting with a person that you feel is your accomplice in many aspects of your life. Before baby, during pregnancy, it is good to start outlining parenting methods and when the baby comes you will have a partner in heart and soul.

New baby, new friends.

Trust me on this one. You might keep your closest friends but single people and people with family sometimes don’t match. You’ll find yourself talking about what your child does or doesn’t do, that new thing you read online, the new priorities in your life and if your old friends don’t seem to accept that, you’ll be making new friends. And that is not bad, don’t feel guilty about it. Your priorities are just different.

Remember you are a person too

You liked music before your baby, you liked a certain movie, going to certain places, talk about certain things. Remember all this once your baby is born. You might not have the time or the energy at first but you will, eventually. Remember that you were someone who enjoyed certain things and you need to keep being yourself. Your kid will love you, I can attest that.

If you feel like failing, keep trying.

During pregnancy, the very thought of raising a human being might seem overwhelming. When the baby is here you might feel that too. The love you have for your child will overpower any feeling of failure and you will keep trying to do your best.

Love comes first

A bassinet is good, that new brand of diapers that don’t cause a rash is great, who are going to be the baby’s godparents is also good to know but, above all, love is going to be the most important thing you feel/do/give to your baby. Love your child with all your being and you’ll be the best parent in the world.

That period where you transition from pregnancy to parenthood is crucial in your life. Your baby won’t remember anything, don’t worry. You will figure everything out if you are aware that you love your child and you see what works best for your family. Parenting isn’t easy but millions of parents over the years only prove that parenting is a natural ability. Let your child teach you what love means and you’ll have a hang of parenting.

References

5 Things to Know When Choosing Diapers for Your Baby

May 27, 2017 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

One of the less glamorous parts of being a parent involves changing diapers. While there’s plenty of advice out there about how to change them, information is scarce on how to choose the right brand. Before you load up your supermarket cart, here’s 5 things you should know.

Disposable Diapers Are Safe

There’s an ongoing debate about whether to use cloth diapers or disposable ones. Cloth diaper advocates argue that disposables aren’t safe but this isn’t true. The top sheet of a disposable diaper is made from polypropylene while the backing sheet is made from polyethylene. These chemicals might sound dangerous but they’re gentle on skin and FDA-approved.

Most Brands Are Unisex

Some new parents wonder if certain diapers are better for boys while others favor girls. According to an article from Parents magazine, it doesn’t matter. Pampers spokesperson Tricia Higgins shared, “We were able to make diapers that have absorbency in the areas that all babies need with only one design.” Problem solved.

Diaper Rash Isn’t Caused by Diapers

There’s a common belief that diaper rash can be prevented by switching diaper brands. However, the rash itself isn’t caused by the diaper. It’s most commonly caused by prolonged exposure to urine or stool. To prevent it, make sure you change your baby’s diaper often. In some rare cases, a diaper that’s too tight can cause diaper rash. Again, this is less about the brand and more about the sizing.

Cloth Diapers Don’t Equal Early Potty Training

There’s an urban mommy legend that using cloth diapers means their little one will start potty training earlier. This is a myth. The type of diaper you’re using doesn’t determine the speed of this big step. While some studies have shown that kids in cloth diapers were potty trained by 18 months, that difference was cultural, not material. In those cultures, the moms spent more time with their kids. Thus, they moved to potty training much quicker.

Save Money with Store Brands

Thanks to savvy marketing, most moms trust big diaper brands. However, it’s okay to opt for a store brand if you want to save a few bucks. They may not have the name recognition, but they’ve got close to the same absorption.

When you know the facts, buying diapers isn’t as stressful as it seems.

References:

I saw Miracles

October 7, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

When a woman is pregnant, her body changes. It changes to conform to the little human that is growing inside of her. It’s a beautiful thing…. pregnancy. It’s a time when you start taking those weekly photos, and downloading every pregnancy app possible and start clicking on due date clubs, breastfeeding clubs, meds or no meds clubs, first time mom’s or more than ones…. you join any and all the clubs you can because you want to be a part of it all. You want to be there.. and chat and get excited with all these other mommies. You even have this fantasy of meeting or knowing another pregnamt mom and becoming best friends with her because then your babies will be best friends for the rest of their lives… at least that’s what I wished.

I had two cousins and three good friends who were pregnant the same time as me. We all planned baby showers and maternity shoots. We all went shopping as soon as we found out we were pregnant because we all wanted to be the first one to buy something for our little nugget. A keepsake to save forever.

But my pregnancy became something else when we received the fetal diagnosis. My pregnancy was no longer this happy occasion. It was no longer this exciting thing. It’s was now a tragedy. It suddenly became this scary and awful thing to happen to us. This pregnancy became sad. And I became numb. For many many weeks I was just numb.

I saw Miracles

I remember each doctors appointment we went to became such a chore for me. I hated going to the doctors. We had to go every week, sometimes twice a week for check ups. I was so afraid I wouldn’t hear a heartbeat on the monitor. I feared that the ultrasound would show that my babies were dead. I literally hated going. From the moment we left the doctors office to the 3 to 7 days we went back and I saw and heard heartbeats, I held my breath. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. I could barely function. All that kept me going was God’s mercy, His love and His strength.

I’d smile at everyone else’s pregnancy quirks. I’d even LIKE and comment ‘oh how cute’ at all their ultrasound pics and maternity photos. I oohed and awwwed along with everyone else at their lavish dream come true baby showers. And about 75% of me was really happy for then. Honestly! Pregnancy is an amazing experience…. but at that time, I hated everything about it. That 25% of me just wished I could run and hide forever.

And although they were ALL due months before me, my babies came into this world fighting to stay in it. And this is where my life took a drastic turn. Suddenly I wasn’t pregnant with these sad little sick babies anymore. Suddenly I was the mother of these two incredibly amazing and strong and resilient preemie baby’s! Suddenly I was thrust into this unknown world called The NICU. Suddenly I became a NICU mother.

I… had… no… idea…….

I had no idea the Lord chose me… He chose ME to witness miracles. During my pregnancy I had no idea. I didn’t seee what the Lord was preparing me for. I didn’t see what my purpose was. And still to this day I don’t really know exactly what my purpose is. But I see now. I see that everything that happened during my pregnancy wasn’t something sad that was happening to us. It wasn’t this great tragedy. It was a blessing… it was a MIRACLE. My mind was so clouded by sadness and the dream I had had about having a son. I had hoped and wished and prayed for so many years for a boy that I had planned everything. I planned what my pregnancy with a son was going to be like. From the baby announcement to the baby royalty-prince themed baby shower. I had it all planned out.

I should have known the Lord had other plans. I should have realized early on that the Lord was going use me and use US in a way that we may never fully understand. He is using us now to show the world what prayer can do. He is using us to show the world that miracles do happen. That no matter how bad something is, no matter how bad a disease the doctors will diagnose, He is a Healer.

I was so incredibly blessed to be a witness, everyday, to my babies growing outside of my womb. God’s creation. While everyone was still pregnant and complaining about how big they are, their feet swelling, their increased appetite, their babies kicking them in their ribs… I got to see mine in real life. I saw them in person instead of a 4D video. I saw what they looked like. I saw them smile for the first time. I saw them open their eyes to an amazing world for the first time. I saw them fight through breathing tubes to be taken off within weeks of their premature birth. I saw their fingers moving and curling and searching for mine. And then I felt their little fingers, fingers as small as a q-tip, wrapped around mine. I couldn’t hold my daughter for 2 weeks and my son for 4 weeks… but I did. Instead of feeling their kicks inside of me, I played with their toes while I held them.

As hard and difficult as the nicu journey was for me…. it was the most amazing and life changing experience I will never forget. I look at life completely differently. And I am forever grateful to the nurses and doctors who helped us during my pregnancy, time in the nicu and for all the support after we left.

So I end NICU Awareness Month with To God Be The Glory ♡ We witnessed miracles.

Guest Author:
Angelina Castleberry writes on her blog All the Days the Lord has Made 4 Me. You can find an issue close to her heart at Made for a Miracle, a website for a group dedicated to helping families through the NICU journey with prayers and support.

Nursing in Public and Private Places

September 23, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

Whatever you call it, a nursing room, mother’s room, lactation room, station, nook or pod, nursing moms are making waves in the fight to have their voices heard. As the largest and most lucrative target market, companies are starting to take notice of the demand for nursing spaces and are creating accommodations for moms. Although many locations are not five star accommodations companies are leveraging open breastfeeding policies and providing nursing moms with spaces to breastfeed or breast pump.
According to federal law (and adopted by 48 states) a woman can breastfeed in public or private places she’s allowed to be without discrimination or harassment. What this means is a woman is free to exercise their natural right to breastfeed as long as she (as a person and not just as a breastfeeding mom) is allowed to be there. But if a woman chooses to she can nurse and breast pump in private.

Nursing in Public and Private Places

From airports, to retail stores and sports complexes moms are campaigning for accommodations. So if you are in nursing mom and you need a comfy spot to breast pump or breastfeed what do you need to look for? Here are the basic requirements outlined by Moms Pump Here for a nursing room:
• Comfy chair
• An electric outlet
• Changing table
• Sink
• A space with a door that locks
Some nursing rooms can lack any one of these requirements but some businesses go over and beyond to provide a great experience for moms using their facilities. Some outstanding amenities are recliners, TV’s, WiFi, refrigerators, microwaves, beautiful decorations and more.

If you plan on using a nursing room on the go and want to prepare before heading to the location here are some items to bring with you just in case an alternative is not available:

• Cooler with an ice pack to keep pumped breast milk
• Baby wipes and napkins
• Hand sanitizer or disinfectant wipes (to wipes down a seat or table)
• A manual breast pump in case there are no electrical outlets to plug in an electrical pump (plus it’s easier to carry)
• A small bottle of water
• A coloring book, crayons and stickers for your older child or toddler

No matter if you breastfeed in public or private places, always know your rights and be prepared in case a location does not have the essential amenities.

Guest Author:

Priya Nembhard is Co-founder of Moms Pump Here. Moms Pump Here is an app that helps nursing mothers locate a safe and private place to breastfeed or breastpump. You can get the Moms Pump Here app on iTunes today.

To Show or Not to Show

September 22, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

I often go through a similar thought process before signing up to exhibit at expecting parents expos. At first, the deterrents rear their ugly head.

In the sea of so many compelling exhibitors, is it even possible to stand out?

Is the amount of preparation really worth it?

Will anyone even listen long enough to understand who we are and what we do?

But in the end, I overcome all of my own objections for one simple reason: I feel compelled to educate expecting parents on the importance of cord blood banking. Though the practice of storing the stem cells found in a newborn’s cord blood and cord tissue has gained tremendous traction, there are still so many expecting parents who aren’t aware of it or, worse, have misconceptions about it.

So, I’m taking my knowledge to the upcoming Expecting Parents & Baby Expo to be held on October 18 at Terrace on the Park in Queens, NY. It will be jam packed with activities and opportunities to learn about the latest, best products and services for newborns. But for me, as a Cord Blood Field Educator for Cryo-Cell International, what drew me to the Expo is the opportunity to present the latest developments in stem cell research and the critical role stem cells play in regenerative medicine.

Though there are countless online resources some terrific pregnancy apps, I find that nothing replaces the face-to-face discussions I inevitably get into as a passionate advocate for umbilical cord blood banking. And it’s never just about cord blood banking costs. Parents come questioning cord blood banking pros and cons and wind up learning about the use of cord blood in clinical trials to potentially treat autism, cerebral palsy and type 1 diabetes. I have met families who have family histories of certain cancers or immunological disorders for whom stem cell banking for potential future use in the family is therefore incredibly compelling.

My main objective has been reached if even just one expecting mom leaves the expo having decided to store her baby’s cord blood stem cells. I’m even quite happy if one expecting mom leaves simply considering storing her baby’s stem cells whereas she came not even knowing the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity exists!

And between you and the blogosphere, once I’ve turned on their switch to cord blood banking, I know they will choose Cryo-Cell International for their stem cell storage. Cryo-Cell International was the first cord blood bank to separate and store stem cells, the first cord blood bank to adopt the industry’s premium processing method, and the first private cord blood bank to be awarded FACT (the Foundation for the Accreditation for Cellular Therapy) accreditation for voluntarily adhering to the most stringent quality standards in the industry. Since inception, 100% of Cryo-Cell International’s clients’ specimens have been viable upon thaw and no other cord blood company can make that statement. Today, over 500,000 parents worldwide have trusted Cryo-Cell International to store their baby’s cord blood stem cells.

It turns out, Cryo-Cell does stand out, loads of people listen, and all the effort is very much worth its while.

Guest Author:

Michele Mesbah is passionate and driven to educate expecting parents about the importance of cord blood banking. You can find Michele on her facebook page as well as on Cryo-Cell! Come see Michele at the next Expecting Parents & Baby Expo!

Childcare for the Breastfed Baby

September 7, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

As a working mom of three breastfed children, I am often asked how I managed to continue nursing even when my babies were in daycare. Many care providers are more familiar with formula-fed infants, but a teenaged babysitter who sits on date nights, in-home nannies, and even grandparents can often be unsure of how caring for a breastfed baby might be different from caring for a formula-fed baby.

Here are some tips to help you, your care provider, and your baby find the right balance for breastfeeding.

Offer the breast if possible. Some employers provide on-site daycare and this can help tremendously. Moms can visit and nurse the baby on breaks from work. This cuts down on the pumping sessions during the day and provides an opportunity for bonding between mom and baby.

Pack the bottles sparingly at first. The only thing worse than spilled breastmilk is wasted breastmilk. If you know your baby can take 24 ounces of breastmilk in one day, resist the urge to pack three 8-ounce bottles. The care provider will need to warm up 8-ounces every time they think your baby is ready to take a bottle, and sometimes the baby will only want to take 2-4 ounces of the bottle and then they need to discard the remaining breastmilk. Pack the bottles in 4-ounce increments and allow the care provider to use them more frequently.

Specify the Schedule. Let them know when and how much the baby should be fed. Sometimes breastfed babies are overfed breastmilk because they fuss or cry. Remind your provider that breastfeeding is not only about food but comfort and cuddles also come with cozy times with mom. Encourage the provider to offer more breastmilk only after other options have been exercised. Examples could be walking, rocking, cuddling, bouncing, or singing. Also, if you plan to breastfeed after pick-up, request that no bottles be offered after a certain time so that baby will be hungry when you are reunited.

Trust Your Sitter. Your care provider will develop a very special bond with your baby. He or she is not replacing you in your baby’s life, but seeing special smiles and catching cozy moments can create uncomfortable feelings. Allow them to develop a warm relationship because if our children cannot be with us, they should still be with people who love and care for them in wonderful ways.

For additional tips about breastfeeding, breast pumping, and caring for the breastfed baby, visit momspumphere.com.

Author:
Kim Harrison is co-founder of Moms Pump Here. Moms Pump Here is an app that helps nursing mothers locate a safe and private place to breastfeed or breastpump. Download her Moms Pump here app today!

Just another one of those days

August 26, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

Today was just another one of those days. The kind of day where I just want to be left alone. I don’t want to interact with anybody. I don’t want to see anybody. I don’t want to talk to anybody. I don’t want to be around anybody. I just want to be left alone. I want to crawl back into bed, put the blankets over my head and sleep. I want to sleep. I want to take a mommy time out. I wish time could pause for, like, a week. Does anyone else ever feel this way??

It was Just another one of those days

I was diagnosed with Post Partum Depression back in August. It was actually really funny when the case manager told me the results of my little “psych” test… she was like.. “well who can blame you?! you have twins in the NICU!!! hahahaha” … I remember I sat there… having just finished crying hysterically, and the only thought in my head was, ‘she’s laughing… this lady is laughing at me’….

….and that’s how I was diagnosed with post partum depression…with someone laughing at me. Maybe she wasn’t laughing AT me. But she was laughing because OF me. I wanted to strangle her right there in that room. All the anger I had at the doctors.. at my situation.. then to be shuffled into this 8 x 10 foot meeting room, just to be sat in the corner and laughed at… I was angry.

I’m STILL angry. I’m angry today. I’m angry right now. And I don’t really know why. I’m sad. I’m annoyed and irritable…at everything and towards everybody. There are people that want to help us.. people that want to help me… and I just want to be left alone. I don’t want anybody’s help. I don’t want anyone’s advice. I don’t want people looking at me.. or talking to me.. just let me be. Let me be silent. Let me sit on the couch all day and do nothing. Let me sleep. Let me eat. Let me drink. Let me be without asking me questions. Let me be without wondering if I’m okay. Let me be!

<<deep breath>>

That’s not me. That’s not who I am. That’s not how I am. I pray. I pray for God to get me out of this. I pray for God to give me the strength to get me past this day. Get me past feeling like this. Get me moving forward and feeling better. I am normally a “people person”. I like going out and having fun. I like going out with friends. I have always been the party planner. Birthdays, Girls nights out, Girls night in, play dates and slumber parties. I plan those. I have those. I love those.

I pray one day God can get me out of this depression. I know there is a lesson in everything He has for me. I just pray for strength. I pray to just get through it. I don’t need doctors or medication. I just need God!

My family needs me. My babies need me.

If you’re going through depression… you’re not alone. Please share your thoughts. I’m here for you and I know you are here for me.

God Bless

Author:
Angelina Castleberry writes on her blog All the Days the Lord has Made 4 Me. You can find an issue close to her heart at Made for a Miracle, a website for a group dedicated to helping families through the NICU journey with prayers and support.

The Age of the Super Mom

August 25, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

It is the age of the “Super Mom.” Women are called on to play every role and are convinced we have to. In the pre WWII era women played the role of homemaker. We were expected to keep the home polished, cook for the family, serve our husbands and stay quiet. So much has changed. Women have transformed and society has transformed because of it. Women’s rights have improved but we are still left with a western culture that caters to male dominance. While we may think women are breaking through the glass ceiling we are still being sexualized and pulled to extreme limits to keep up with our male counterparts.

There is an expectation that women have to be able to have children, raise well rounded children, have a successful career, maintain a healthy lifestyle, spend time with friends, have a social life, nurture friendships for young children, care for aging parents, clean the house, cook dinner, maintain a strong relationship with a partner, maintain sanity and keep learning and growing and more! It all seems so out of wack and unrealistic. How are women supposed to be the wholesome being society wants us to be and be sane through it all? Through these unrealistic expectations women have found a way to make it work. Although doing one thing consistently at 100% seems like a dream one thing has made the age of the Super Mom possible…technology.

The Age of the Super Mom

The Super Mom can be defined as the woman that makes life happen for her and her family. A step up from Superwoman, she not only magically maintains a life and sanity but her children are growing just fine. Technology has improved the lives of women by allowing them to keep in touch with friends, order food online or get 20 minute recipes online, order clothes, shoes, keep up with news and fashion, vacuum a house using small robots, book nights out with their partner and get a babysitter in the process. It has even allowed her to improve her education with online degrees, digital books, educational videos and apps that improve thinking skills and help to navigate life’s needs.

The Super Mom also lives on the edge of the expectations of society by holding her own, knowing what she is capable of and not capable of. They tend to define their reality on their own terms and not by what society deems appropriate. Through the use of technology they have also found their voice. When another mom is shamed for breastfeeding in public or women are objectified in distasteful ways they speak up and hit social media outlets to tell the world they exist and what they have to say matters. According to the Moms and Media (Edison Research 2013) research study moms are mobile and digitally savvy multitaskers which spend over a third of their time engaging online resources and apps to balance life. “95% of moms own a cellphone, with 64% owning a smartphone. And she keeps it close — 89% reported that the smartphone is always or most of the time within arm’s length vs 74% for regular cell phone moms.”

As society shifts so do the women that make the world go around, the care takers, money makers, and policy shakers. Women do not wake up and decide they are going to tackle the world head on they just do it. With technology on her side the Super Mom is a force to be reckoned with!

Author:
Priya Nembhard is Co-founder of Moms Pump Here. Moms Pump Here is an app that helps nursing mothers locate a safe and private place to breastfeed or breastpump. You can get the Moms Pump Here app on iTunes today.

Running on Empty – Post-Natal Depression

August 19, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com Leave a Comment

I’m sure I’m not the only one that has done this…. You jump in the car and as you’re going along the fuel light comes on. You mentally make a note to stop at the next garage and fill up. A few garages pass you by and you don’t stop. There are a few more miles in the tank right?? Nearly home now so I’ll just fill up the next time I pop out….

You totally forget that you need fuel, next time you get in the car; there is the light again brightly staring back at you reminding you you’re running low on fuel. I’ll admit I quite often run on fumes wondering how many miles (or meters) I’ve got left before I judder to an embarrassing halt.

I’m lucky to have never actually run out of fuel in my car before even though I’ve pushed it to the absolute limit many times.

What on earth has this got to do with post-natal depression?

My Experience with Post-Natal Depression

Well, I now know how those poor cars felt. Dragging themselves along, running on the bare minimum, begging for more energy in order to keep going and do the job they need to do.

Like the car, my body had lots of parts that all needed to work together in order to keep going and produce the desired results. It felt as though all the parts in my body were pulling in different directions and working against each other creating an inner turmoil.

I am not a car. I do not run on diesel or petrol. I am an exhausted Mummy and I am currently running on minimum sleep and copious amounts of tea.
Each day I wake up even more exhausted than when I went to bed the previous night.

How on earth am I going to make it through this day and look after two other humans as well as myself while running so low on fuel?
But I didn’t have a choice. I had to look after them and myself, somehow. The longer this cycle continued the lower and lower I was running on reserves. My tank wasn’t just empty; the sides were sucking in on themselves trying to squeeze out any remaining fuel I can find.

One of the things that I found most exhausting in the early days after diagnosis was coping with the relentlessness of my own thoughts.
The constant internal battle of conflicting thoughts and feelings. The immense love I felt for these children coupled with the desire to get in the car and drive as far away as possible.

Not because I didn’t love them or want to care for them. But because I was trying to escape from myself, from the situation I was in. I was trying to escape from the never ending thoughts that were going through my mind. It’s as if my mind couldn’t and wouldn’t stop working.
But I quickly learned that where ever I went my thoughts went too. There was no escape!

The constant questioning and self-doubt about the decisions I was making as a mother was also very tiring. Many days I didn’t know if what I was feeling were my true feelings or just a result of sheer exhaustion… The antidepressants made me feel like a zombie, going through the motions of day to day life. Feeling things on one hand but not feeling them on the other. It was another internal conflict.

Anxiety was also a huge issue for me. Having never experienced anxiety attacks before I found these debilitating to the extent that I didn’t want to leave the house.

I still to this day have not managed to pin point any trigger for these attacks. They would come on at random times throughout the day and usually take me totally by surprise. Another symptom of PND that I had no idea about until I started experiencing it. The worse times for me to get the anxiety attacks were when I was driving, I’ve had to stop the car quite a few times and wait for it to pass. Even if I wasn’t particularly anxious about anything I would still get these strong bouts of anxiety without warning. It was as if my mind wasn’t linked to my physical being and I had no control over any of it.

Pretending to be ok whilst feeling all of these things is also very hard. I have since learned that by pretending I was ok whilst feeling horrendous was further confusing my already imbalanced brain.

Here I was stuck in a no win situation. Trapped in a vicious cycle of battling my own thoughts and feelings on a daily basis with no end in sight.
I constantly searched for ideas to break this relentless cycle. A way to stop the ride and get off, find a different road to get onto and travel away from this.

With no ideas, no maps, no sat nav. I was lost with only my own thoughts as company.

This was going to be a long, journey. There was no ‘final destination’ so I had no idea how long this journey would take. No idea how many wrong turns I would take and no idea how many break downs were ahead when running so low on fuel.

I am still not ‘there’ yet.

My journey continues.

Twists, turns, unexpected setbacks. I still have many miles to travel and although it is going to be rough ride. I’m ready to ride it. I feel confident that I will get off at the end feeling stronger as a mother and a person. I am very determined about this.

Author:
Ellie Marshall is a Mom blogger who has a focus on Post-Natal Depression and spreading awareness on this critical topic. If you’ve recently given birth and feel like you’re unusually depressed or anxious, check out Ellie’s digital homes around the web for more information. You can find her on her WordPress blog or her Facebook Page Honest Mumma!

Save a Preemie, Become a Milk Donor!

August 17, 2015 by basilpuglisi@aol.com 1 Comment

Did you know that when a mother’s own milk is unavailable, donor human milk has been proven to improve the health and survival of fragile infants? Preterm infants are most in need of human milk, yet due to stress and other complications, their moms are the least likely to be able to provide their own milk in the earliest days of life. This is where milk donation and mothers’ milk banks come in.

Mothers with a surplus of milk can give premature infants a better chance to grow and thrive. Donor milk is especially protective against a life-threatening condition, common in preemies, called necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC). A human milk diet is estimated to lower the risk of this condition by a whopping 79%!

Any nursing mom can be screened to become a donor through a nonprofit community milk bank. The process is easy, similar to donating blood, and the deep personal satisfaction that comes from helping improve the health of another baby is great.

New Yorkers wishing to donate can contact Mothers’ Milk Bank Northeast (MMBNE), a nonprofit milk bank operating under the guidelines of the Human Milk Banking Association of North America (HMBANA), whose mission it is to provide safely pasteurized donor human milk to babies in need throughout the Northeast. MMBNE has been serving New York’s most fragile babies since 2012, and has since assisted hundreds of mothers from across the state, and in all 5 NYC boroughs, to generously donate their extra milk!

The four simple steps to donating:

10 minute phone screening
online health history form and consents
free blood draw (paid for by MMBNE)
free shipping of milk (MMBNE provides insulated boxes and pickup by FedEx with overnight shipping to the lab) *convenient Brooklyn depot also available for donors who wish to drop off their milk

Previously frozen milk is accepted as long as it has been stored for no more than 3 months in a refrigerator freezer or 6 months in a stand alone freezer. There is no limit to how much one can donate, but one must commit to providing a minimum of 150 oz (about 30 bags) over time. The minimum amount does NOT have to be sent all at once, and is waived for bereaved mothers.

New York City families have greatly benefited from donor milk. In addition to nine other hospitals across the state, NYU Langone Medical Center, Bellevue Hospital Center, and Maimonides Medical Center now offer MMBNE donor milk as standard of care in their NICUs and nurseries. MMBNE is working closely with many more hospitals, particularly in NYC, to meet the requirements necessary to prescribe donor human milk to their patients.

Author:
Amber Star Merkens is the New York Outreach Coordinator for Mothers’ Milk Bank Northeast and Postpartum Doula serving families in Brooklyn, Queens, and Manhattan.To learn more about donating and receiving milk, call MMBNE’s main office at 212-993-1566, visit their website, or like their Facebook page.